Wednesday, September 24, 2003 @7:01 PM
"If you have built castles in the air, your work need not be lost. That is where they should be. Now put the foundation under them."
--Henry David Thoreau
it has been more than a week. or more than 2 weeks? i lost track of time. 48 more days to A levels? i'm soooo screwed. didn't do well for prelims. passed everything, but not like low passes helped a great deal. only improvements in my GP though. since the highest grade in class was only a B4, i shan't complain. Overall, prelims really sucked. now, it's time to accept reality, so little time, yet so much to do.
i just so want to complete my MEP portfolios and settle it asap so that i can concentrate on my other subjects. this "lethargic" inertia in me is really bad. got to do more history essays! more lit essays! and get down to seeing teachers for consultation! i guess everything's up to us now. whether i want to help myself. based on my prelim results, i think it's "bye bye" to the music scholarship. morale's really low now. everything seems to be going off track. but i just got to keep it together. pull myself together and work harder. work harder?! i think that's an understatement. i've just got so much to do to achieve what i truly want to achieve. it's scary. Mrs Creff's scolding is kind of still ringing in my ears. think i'll have a nightmare tonight, of doing terribly for my As. =(
i so want to go for ashkenazy concert tomorrow, but i've got no tickets! unless someone wants to sponsor the 200 bucks ticket for me? but looking on the brighter side, i'll get to practise my piano for friday's recital.
the future seems so bleak. pull myself together and work harder!!!
"Nothing is as real as a dream. The world can change around you, but your dream will not. Responsibilities need not erase it. Duties need not obscure it. Because the dream is within you, no one can take it away."
Tuesday, September 16, 2003 @3:19 AM
forced to come back to reality. 4 weeks plus another 4 weeks after baccalaureate. and it's good luck to me. gosh. i really can't believe it. can't believe the amount of stuff i have to complete by next week too! i'm sooo dead. DEAD. D-E-A-D. my gamelan research, compo portfolio, my recording, and the list goes on. the recording thing is just so totally driving me bananas. got to thank David Charles LOTS for agreeing to sing for me despite being so last minute. i'm terribly sorry. you know how disorganised i am. and Khong for agreeing to play for me. and of couse Zhon, who HAS to play for me.
"Are you depressed?" went to lesson on sunday and was asked that question. Reason being, i went for vadim repin's concert on saturday. what can i say? what can i say. but lesson was good though i still have to complain that my fingerboard is way way way too high. making playing open fifths double stops at high positions a chore. a pity i do not have fat fingers. Am given the choice of playing beethoven 'spring' sonata or a Brahms sonata. have yet to decide. Played through my A level programme during piano lesson and Ku said i've finally crossed the line of coming to class to practise. haha. i thought that was funny. schumann was sloppy though, as he says. "attempt to touch my heart. magical tone please. caress the keys!" now i always hear that in my head when i play schumann.
i'm so dead. hate to ramble off the things i have to do. have been playing way, way, way too much over this sept hols. it's scary how time flies. i'm so dead. O Lord, please help me.
"God is out refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble."
--- Psalm 46:1
Tuesday, September 09, 2003 @12:02 PM
haven't been blogging for more than a week and people prob thought i disappeared from the surface of the earth or sth. NO! i'm still alive and breathing, though suffocating with the amount of MEP homework i have! looking on the brighter side, after these portfolio stuff, i'll have much less to do for MEP. just need to practise hard and mug the history component. which shouldn't be much of a problem. (i hope, fingers crossed.) wish me luck everyone!
i don't think anyone passing by will want to read a 2000 word long essay about me, myself and i over the past week. so everything will be summarised. not like i can remember everything, so, with my selective memory, only some events will be up. =) here i go, in chronological order, from last tues... ...
i just remember myself going back to school everyday last week to show ms leong my string quartet. even though sept hols "started" like way before last week for me, i was still going back to school. but i must say that these few days have been pretty productive for me. finished quite a bit of my quartet. =)
thurs was at sentosa with wendy, debs and emerald. i so cannot forget that because i'm lobster fried now thanks to lying on the beach. but i love my tann. so i've got no complaints. it's just funny how my classmates can tease me about being so red. like, "*someone* proposed to u huh? tt's why u're so red." i'm like, ???!!!. not even close to that *someone* and that was like totally OUT OF POINT. =p my quirky classmates.
i thought teachers' celebrations this yr was great. though concert only really started when david charles, warin, joel and another guy came out. i simply love DCT's voice!!! so unique. so mariah. haha. it was great! you just got to hear it for yourself to be totally swept off your feet with his voice. Joel was really good too! didn't know u could sing that well joel! Great job done there! their item was just great, and of course, warin was as fabulous as she can be. she's got the looks, the voice, what more can one ask for?! =) Bhangra was of course energetic and entertaining. with about 9 people jumping around on stage. maybe prancing's a better word? no, too graceful. ok, i'll stick to the cliche word of dancing. they were good i must say. i wonder if the j1s will continue this "tradition" after the j2s are gone. =)
Ku was super sarcastic to me on sunday. but i think i'm way too lenient with myself. he always tells me that he strives to always make the teacher sut up when he goes for lessons. practise till the teacher has nothing to say. at least get all the notes there. sounds easy. but i know there's a lot of work to be done. i know. lunchtime recital on tues!!! i hope no one turns up. please people, don't turn up. if you wanna do me a favour, don't turn up! =) otherwise i'll need to dig a hole to bury my head even before i play. haha. ok. super lack of confidence here. confidence level will rise only after i practise and see results. or rather, hear results. have got lots of thinking and planning to do for my pieces. esp Schumann. Ms Ku was nicer to me on the other hand. was ordered to fix my bow arm by this week. otherwise she'll hammer me. haha. and was told to send my violin for "healing" one week before the A levels begin. Lots of "healing" to do. lift up fingerboard, do a full check-up for my violin (because my vln can't seem to adapt to helicore G.), and trim my bridge. also, the muffled tone of my vln. humidity level here is really bad and my violin's sucking up all the vapour like nobody's business. silica gel in case didn't help much. though it did help a bit. but i'm so inconsistent about changing it. ms ku challenged me, to see who'll be more consistent in changing sillica gel. i'll try my best. =)
caught two movies within last week. SWAT and Legally Blonde 2. Colin Farrell was really cool. oogling at him through the whole movie. haha. i was FORCED to watch Legally Blonde. she's "pinker" than anyone i know. the show's pretty unrealistic, but entertaining i must say. as min, em and i concluded, she totally reminds us of girls from one particular school. i shan't mention that sch. but if you want to know, go watch Legally Blonde and i guess you should be smart enough to guess which school. =p
that sms marathon with my cousin last night probably made my fingers move faster. he was in Hendon camp, and probably had nothing to do. his smsing skills are one of a kind. really fast and swift. unlike most guys, who are one liners in their smses, or worse, one word, or even worse, monosyllabic. we were msging each other from like 11pm to like 1am in the morning. until i dozed off... But we're going out on saturday!!! haven't decided what or where. it'll depend on how tired he'll be when he comes home.
with the trip to pulau ubin tmr and going out with my cousin on saturday lined up for the hols, it's high time i start doing my work! get it over and done with. my string quartet motif stuck in my head. currently in development section, C# minor.
this entry ain't that short after all. hope it wasn't tortuous though. =)
"If you wish success in life, make perseverance your bosom friend, experience your wise counselor, caution your elder brother and hope your guardian genius."
---Joseph Addison (1672 - 1719)
(just a small note, i've got more photos up! go check it out! 1st link on the left column. =) enjoy!)
Monday, September 01, 2003 @11:51 AM
shao-wen left for UK this morning. poor chap, told us that he'll be studying in a boys' school again. 4 yrs in acs(i). then less than a year in co-ed school. now back to boys' school again. haha. anyway, i'm so going to miss him dancing around in 'brahms'. there'll be no one to crack me up when i'm stressed again. he never fails to make me laugh, that shao wen. he's just so cute. he's a dancer, skirt chaser, violinist, musician, and simply loves himself. will miss you looking into that HUGE mirror in 'brahms'!!! and will definitely miss your stories about wooing people in school. so sad, missing you already! oh yes, and will also miss hearing you whine about rehearsals and 'what time will rehearsal end?' you study hard and have a great time in Winchester ya? i saw the school's photo. it looks like a castle! plus you've got a 14th century chapel! how cool is that? enjoy yourself and take care! remember to contact us again when u're back in december!!! =) (people who didn't go see shao-wen off, the photos are in webshots. the link on the left column. go check it out.)
yesterday was a real tiring day. ran around from place to place. was at emerald's church in the morning for her baptism service with jason, selwyn, tsui man, jon, mel goh, joon hong. then went for violin lesson. met hui 'en at mr ku's place to pass him the teacher's day present. it was a mug 'artistically' drawn by me. hope he likes it. i gave one to ms ku too. she said she was looking for mugs to bring to work. guess my present came at the right time? =) said she's deciding where to bring the mug to show it off. haha. so much for showing off that piece of 'art'. violin lesson was pretty interesting. she said i sway too much and made her all dizzy. so throughout the whole lesson she made me stand still. it was kind of wierd. but she say i'm only made to be still for a week. then maybe i won't sway about that much anymore. well, i hope so. was telling her that i'm probably going for the chamber fest concert but she said i should go for the shanghai string quartet. and she was real nice to call up VCH box office to get me a free ticket! then while i was having piano lesson, ms ku squashed her face against the teaching room's door and i totally jumped. haha. went for the concert with shi mei and ms ku. was swept off my feet by the quartet's rendition of Dvorak American. it was absolutely tastefully done. after the 1st movement, i looked at ms ku in awe and she just had that look of 'i told u they're good!'. they're really good. violist was fantastic. for once the viola wasn't drowned. the other players were fab too! they then played this chinese folk songs thing, arranged by the 2nd violinist. there were some very good arrangements in it. and i really enjoyed it. they played beethoven's "razumovsky" for finale. i'm really appalled by their performance. in the positive manner. i really respect them. they had minimal eye contact, but they really felt the music together in their hearts! it's really a pity that the concert didn't have a very good turn-up. they really deserved a full house. kudos to the shanghai string quartet! bravo!
gotten some inspiration from the chinese folk songs i heard yesterday. time to compose. take care all, and best wishes to shao wen!
"Try not to become a man of success but rather to become a man of value."
---Albert Einstein (1879 - 1955)
